I Reached my Sales Target But...
I have reached my sales target for the year. The last couple of months, I loss a few renewal contracts and tender. In addition to my financial loss, I never thought I could reach the finishing line.
Many told me that I should slow down and celebrate. The new year is still about 17 days away. I am in no mood to celebrate. In fact, I still feel like a loser. The sense of fear and hunger never left me. The recent losses have exacerbated the feeling. I have even started next year's sales activities.
Do I plan to slow down? Probably not. I work hard is not because I want to feel or seen to be successful. I just do not want to feel like a loser. When I first started the business, every day I was worried about my financial commitments.
Since school days, I have never excelled in any sports or subjects. I am not at the bottom, but I am also not the best in anything. As I watch on everyone who did well and thrived. I always wondered I am doomed to be a loser for life. Despite the small successes that I have achieved, the sense of incompetence always lingers the back of mind. That's why I can never stop.
I know no one dies from too much hard work. Will my inner demon eat me alive, and I never get to enjoy the fruits of my labour?